Have you found christmas?
Monday, Dec. 26, 2005 at 12:35 a.m.
Yay! We carolled for the LORD! And I feel soooo good! I've never done it real and proper before. I've felt so close to a church group before. Sure, it's funny to know that. But the only groups I've ever felt close to were my LTC groups. That was fun! Haha, breaking the watermelon on a rusty sharp pole and smashing it on the ground. Bwahahaha! I sang for both days until my voice is now really funny. It's gone a bit hoarse. Actually before the whole thing, I was already losing my voice. I have only God to thank that I didn't lose it completely and that it lasted throughout the entire 2 days.
After the whole thing, I don't think that opening presents and eating a scrumptious delicious mouth-watering dinner is what X'mas is all about. I actually felt really selfish at asking my cousins to wait for me to open presents. It was really stupid and childish I guess. I don't really care anymore. It was so much more fun to spread joy by singing. Maybe some ppl didn't think we were that good, but hey for a church group that didn't have alot of practises. I think that we came out TOPS! And to me, we rocked!! :D The only problem is that I feel so out everytime ppl. It's like I'm the antisocial person. I can't talk about anything that I know like in school. Can't wait to go back to school and yet when I do, I know that it will be my LAST year in MG! I'll miss everyone. Even if they or I didn't really get along well, I'll still miss you guys. I'm a very very very very sentimental dolt. Yes, I'm sorta forced to feel this things. It gives me problems sometimes. It's like even when it's a small thing, I'll still make a fuss over it, cry over it, think so much until I can't take it. And sometimes, when it concerns my mom she'll be like "Why must you make everything so big?!" And then I'll get scolded. Blah. I feel so left out sometimes. I guess it's because I feel kinda lonely sometimes. Stupid green-eye monster. It makes me feel mean and evil when something goes around me and I can't be in it. Not that it's good all the time. It's like when you want attention. But you never get it. And when I finally do, you don't want it, cuz the 'attention' is actually someone scolding you.
Anyhow, we sang at the 9am service in the NEW and IMPROVED and HIGH-TECH QPP! Woot! It cost millions. The hall looks so small when there's no one in it. But when ppl start coming in, the hall looked so big. I was scared at first when they put a mike right in front of me! Realised that no one really knows me in the hall except for a girl in a green 'have you found christmas?' shirt and jeans. The service at 9am is soooo good! It's so much more interesting than the 8am. Cuz I think that the 9am one is more for young ppl. Can't wait for next week's movie trip @ plaza sing. We're gonna watch the chronicles of narnia. :p